Homecoming Horoscopes

Aries: March 21-April 19

Get ready, Aries, you’re in for a treat. That person you’ve been creeping on social media? Turns out you aren’t that much of a creep because they’re creeping right back. So what are you going to do about it? Act like a Bison and use your horns to work your way in there. The results may surprise you.

Taurus: April 20-May 20

Let’s be honest, you chose this school because once a Taurus always a Bison. That being said, it’s time to show your Bison pride. If you so choose, you may even be in for a treat at the Homecoming game. A new lover? A new friend? Will you fall down and into a hot person’s arms? Go to find out.

Gemini: May 21-June 20

Hello, you two-faced little disaster. One of your faces will look super good when you go out. The other? Not so much. If you want any chance of getting your life together, you’ve got to step it up. Step one: Stop what you’re doing. Step two: Take a deep breath. Step three: Figure it out. You need it for your peace of mind.

Cancer: June 21-July 22

Your semester has already been hard enough. If you are going to survive it, you need to find something to take off your plate. Perhaps remove a certain someone from your life. You know whom I’m talking about.

Leo: July 23-Aug. 22

Leo, Leo, Leo, you have hardly worked … kind of hard. You’ve got to kick into high gear to get through the next couple months. You will be worked to the bone, but don’t give up. There’s a diploma at the end of it.

Virgo: Aug. 23- Sept. 22

You’ve always been a little out there and a lot indecisive. That’s OK. That’s who you are. You’ve also always been a mess; time to clean up. Shower for the first time this week; your roommate will thank you. Think about getting a pet as it will probably help you take care of yourself, or at least you two can smell bad together.

Libra: Sept. 23-Oct. 22

It’s your time to shine, Libra. You will be in the spotlight this week, and your horns will be shining. Get out there and strut your stuff. Your wardrobe will revamp itself, and you will gain new confidence without a caffeine-induced energy high.

Scorpio: Oct. 23-Nov. 21

Time to get a move on, Scorpio. A change is coming. The end is nigh … just kidding. You have felt a change coming for a while. Now it’s time for that change. Switch roommates, get a new job, buy a car, you do you, but also you need to make a change because it’s way overdue.

Sagittarius: Nov. 22-Dec. 21

What up, bro? You’re about to crack open a cold bottle of apple juice with your buds. This week is for bonding and relaxation. Kick back, drink your juice, start up the oil diffuser and get your groove on.

Capricorn: Dec. 22-Jan. 19

Love train coming in. Romance is in your future, and that means candles and roses and your favorite food. Whether you’re in a steady relationship or just dating around and checking out your options, romance is in the air.

Aquarius: Jan. 20-Feb. 18

As summer draws to a close, you’ve been feeling down, but your friends will soon lift you back up. Remember to value and spend time with your friends. They do love you despite how alone you may feel sometimes.

Pisces: Feb. 19-March 20

You’ve always swam against the current, no matter how quiet you have been about it in the past. It’s time to unleash the beast. Let your freak flag fly. Forget the sarcasm; get authentic in here.

Leave a Reply