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Bike Share Bikes Migrate Back to Fargo

Trained outdoorsmen can first hear the wild creatures before they become visible.

“The tintinnabulation unique to Bike Share B-Cycles bells can be heard from miles away,” John Helmut, a junior studying range sciences, said. “It sounds like spring.”

The gaggle of 100 Great Rides Bike Share bicycles has returned to Fargo, completing a near 2,000-mile migration from Florida.

“The bikes winter near the Orlando area,” said Sara Curry-Watson, a conservationist who specializes in Bike Share bikes. “Unlike humans, they thrive down there.”

The bikes assemble in a V-formation, traversing down sidewalks and streets. This year’s migration was almost a complete success.

“We did lose a bike along the way,” Curry-Watson said. “That particular case is being treated as a criminal investigation, and we are working with local and federal law enforcement.”

Under the Endangered Species Act of 1973, the tampering with rare creatures, like Bike Share bikes, violates federal law.

Curry-Watson confirmed that Great Rides lost contact with the bike “somewhere in rural Kentucky,” but because of the ongoing nature of the case, she could not speculate further.

Rumors have been swirling since the bike’s disappearance, with some claiming petty politics as the aggressor.

“Clearly, the bike was hijacked by a Trump-supporting libertarian who hates the socialist nature of Bike Share,” said Erin Weber, president of NDSU Democrats.

Self-described Trump-supporting libertarian Nick Borstod, apparently.

“What I can say is this: I love bikes. Bikes are good. Always have been. Socialist bikes, not so much. But bikes are great, and I love them,” he said.

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