To Sleep Around or to Settle Down?

A fresh take on that all too present dilemma

During my limited time in university, I’ve dealt with an internal conflict that I cannot shake. One that many students my age face as well. It is this personal struggle that makes us human, biology versus society. Do I sleep around or do I look to settle down?

It’s something that seems childish, I know. In time, the choice becomes clear, but for now, I abuse my youth to risk it all on another notch in my belt. Both options have their perks, on one hand; I don’t have any emotional attachment to that person. You have nights of fun and fooling around, it becomes a dirty secret between you and them. It’s just so damn fun. This option is perfect for the ones who don’t like commitment and want something (or someone) to help pass the time. Sex is also a human craving we all have and have the need to fulfill. College is the ideal time to make dumb choices and learn from our mistakes. You begin to understand what you like, who you mesh well with, and things you should avoid. This can become an issue on campuses, as many people do sleep with multiple partners and the student body serves as a petri dish for disease and sexually transmitted infections. So, screw around with caution.

On the flip side, relationships fulfill the need for sex (if you’re into that) and provide human connection. Find your person, fall in love, gain a best friend. Dating is fun yet expensive, so this can be an automatic turn-off for broke college students. It seems so easy to find the right person on a campus of almost fifteen thousand students, yet I still haven’t found one person who I’d be willing to spend a good chunk of my time with. This may be a personal issue, but I know many other students feel the same. Getting into a relationship seems like a great idea until you think about the logistics. Most of us honestly just don’t have time for a significant other. 

You have class, homework, extracurriculars, a job. All these responsibilities add up and it’s overwhelming when you try to bring another person into the equation. Not to mention taking that other person’s schedule into consideration. It can be a terrifying feat to face, yet so many do it with ease. College is the time to be selfish and focus on yourself, so dating can quickly be shoved to the back burner. Making such a deep and vulnerable connection with someone is something so beautiful and scary. You take a chance and open up to someone, find something special. It can be anxiety-inducing, maddening, yet exhilarating. Both options I’ve listed have their pros and cons, but which choice is right for me?

This question still floats around my mind because I am unable to answer it. Blame it on being young and indecisive, but I still have no idea what I want. But I’ve come to the consensus that it’s okay to be unsure. This time is designed for us to figure out who we are and what we want. Whether that be to have multiple short-term sex partners or a long-term one, the choice is yours.

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