A Thanksgiving Transformation for a Newcomer
Thanksgiving is a cherished American tradition, a time when families gather around the table to share a feast and reflect on gratitude. The history of Thanksgiving, rooted in the 1621 harvest celebration shared between the Pilgrims and the Wampanoag people, has since evolved into a broader expression of togetherness and thanks. While its original context is uniquely American, the spirit of gratitude resonates universally, transcending cultural boundaries. For me, an international student experiencing my first Thanksgiving last year, this holiday transformed into something deeply personal: “Friendsgiving.”
Before arriving in the United States, my understanding of Thanksgiving was pieced together from movies and books. Images of roasted turkey, cranberry sauce, and pumpkin pie formed the backdrop of a holiday that seemed both nostalgic and unfamiliar. Yet, last year, at North Dakota State University (NDSU), I experienced Thanksgiving in a way that reshaped my perspective. It was not just about the meal or the day off from classes but about building a sense of belonging in a new land.
NDSU’s Student Affairs and Institutional Equity, in partnership with the NDSU Foundation, organized a Friendsgiving dinner for International students, graduate students, and students staying in the residence halls during the Thanksgiving holiday. The invitation was warm and inclusive. For someone thousands of miles from home, sharing a meal with others who felt similarly uprooted was a welcome solace. Therefore, I decided to attend.
Walking into the Friendsgiving dinner, I noticed that the atmosphere was vibrant and inviting. Round tables filled the room, each adorned with the familiar trappings of a traditional Thanksgiving feast: roast turkey, mashed potatoes, sage stuffing, green bean casserole, and, of course, a variety of pies. There were also vegetarian options like vegetable lasagna, a nod to the diverse dietary needs of the attendees. A new addition to my culinary vocabulary was lefse, a Norwegian flatbread that several students excitedly explained to me as a local favorite. The smells alone were intoxicating, a medley of savory and sweet that made the gathering feel like a homecoming.
But it was the people, not just the food, that made Friendsgiving extraordinary. I found myself sitting with students from across the globe: the USA, Bangladesh, India, Nepal, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Iran, Nigeria, Ghana, the Bahamas, China, the Philippines, and beyond. As we were eating around, we also exchanged stories of our own cultural holidays and traditions. It struck me that while the specifics of Thanksgiving, turkey, cranberries, and pies were unfamiliar to many of us, the underlying principle of gratitude was universal. We laughed, shared memories, and built connections. For that afternoon, the Oceti Sakowin Ballroom in Memorial Union transformed into a microcosm of the world, united by the simple act of breaking bread together.
Friendsgiving for me also extended last year beyond attending that dinner. The graduate student organization of my department organized a multicultural potluck for students, faculty, staff, and their families. We each brought food from our heritage or contributed to the Thanksgiving tradition by bringing turkey or pie. Many of us brought family recipes passed down for generations. Sharing those dishes felt like a bridge between cultures, a reminder that food and gratitude have the power to connect people in profound ways.
What struck me most about Friendsgiving was how it expanded the meaning of Thanksgiving. Traditionally, Thanksgiving is rooted in the idea of family gatherings. But Friendsgiving highlights a modern twist: a celebration of chosen family. For many students, especially those who cannot travel home, friends become the family we lean on. This sense of chosen community is a gift that connects deeply in a world where physical distances often separate us from those we hold dear. Reflecting on that first Friendsgiving, I am grateful to NDSU for organizing such an inclusive and thoughtful event. It introduced me to an iconic American tradition and provided a space where I felt seen and welcomed. As Friendsgiving approaches again this year, I look forward to attending with newer gratitude.
Whether you call it Thanksgiving or Friendsgiving, the heart of the holiday remains the same: a time to pause, reflect, and give thanks to the people who make our lives meaningful. As the Thanksgiving season unfolds, we all can try to embrace the transformative power of gratitude. Maybe by hosting a Friendsgiving, inviting someone new to your table, or simply taking a moment to appreciate the connections in your life. In doing so, we carry forward the legacy of Thanksgiving in its truest sense, a celebration of shared humanity that knows no borders. For me, Friendsgiving will always hold a special place in my heart. It reminds me that even in unfamiliar places, kindness and community can create a home.