Our vice president is literally hilarious without even trying. Imagine a world where you refuse to eat with anyone of the opposite sex without your wife.

This is what Mike Pence does. Mike Pence follows the Billy Graham Rule for evangelical Christians. Basically, to avoid being promiscuous, he chooses to avoid relationships with the opposite sex.

That means he won’t eat with a woman at a restaurant without his wife present. He wouldn’t, for instance, get in a car with a woman who wasn’t his wife alone.

This is confusing on multiple levels. For instance, why are we treating women like all they want to do is have sex with you? I guarantee you Mike Pence, this is not the case.

I went around the union to ask students what they think of the Billy Graham Rule.

Where the heck is the trust?

“I believe it shouldn’t matter. There should be enough trust in a relationship to be able to have dinner with someone of the opposite gender without worry.” Jonah Thesing, a junior at North Dakota State, said.

Isn’t it assumed you trust your spouse? Gosh, maybe your spouse is a politician, “I did not have sexual …”

Either way, where is the trust. Isn’t it assumed that trusting your significant other enough to, I don’t know, work without your penis falling out of their pants, is a default when it comes to marriage?

“Oh, honey I can’t allow myself to go to dinner, I am afraid I might sleep with my friend.” I would imagine is what Mike Pence would say.

This is basically what he is saying. I cannot trust myself enough to go out and have dinner because I am an uncontrollable sex demon.

Isn’t this just kind of stupid?

“Honestly, I think it’s crazy stupid and kind of uncomfortable for everyone. Like you’re a grown ass man, you can do stuff without your wife. Don’t be stupid or do things that’ll get you in trouble?” Mackenzie Eckman, a senior in women and gender studies said.

So, Mike Pence, I get it. Women are throwing themselves at you. Maybe it’s the dead eyes? Or the Anderson Cooper hair?

Either way, isn’t it just kind of stupid? Like you can’t avoid stupid, marriage-threatening behavior when your wife isn’t around?

How do you present this to your female friends? “Uh, yeah, I would love to have dinner, but if we do, gosh, I might cheat on my wife.”

Ignoring how demeaning that truly is, and forgetting everything else. The logic is just so stupid.

Cough, professionalism, isn’t that a thing?

Mike Pence, or more properly, Vice President Mike Pence. This guy is the guy that is second in command.

This guy is, in our system, the second-best option to be president, which was a heck of a lot easier to say with Joe Biden.

“The idea that a professional will not meet with a member of the opposite gender without the presence of their spouse perpetuates the old-fashioned ideas that two professionals cannot control themselves without supervision. That our vice president supports this should be deeply disturbing to the public.” Cara Laubersteimer, a computer engineering student said.

Again, Mike Pence is vice president. This is something that may or may not have happened yet, but what about his work relationships.

Considering he avoids being with women who are not named Karen Pence, and she doesn’t hold qualifications to sit in on serious national important stuff, who is Mike Pence going to appoint to be around him?

You got it. Guys. Men.

Ladies, can you hear the glass ceiling falling down.

Look, Mike Pence, you probably think you are doing right by your wife. But goodness gracious, you are doing the opposite for every other woman out there.

This practice belongs the same place that parachute pants and Nelly belong, in the past where they no longer hurt anyone.