Setting Boundaries

The positive and the negative

Setting boundaries is something that we do to improve our relationships with our family, friends and significant others. A quote from my favorite boundaries book, Good Boundaries and Goodbyes, says, “Boundaries are not going to fix the person. But they will help you stay fixed on what is good, what is acceptable, and what you need to stay healthy and safe.” Here are some good and dreadful things that come with setting boundaries. 

The number one thing that comes with setting boundaries is that it helps grow and improve relationships. And, it will also help communication within that relationship. Although good things often come with setting boundaries, there can also be bad things, like having that person you set the boundary with later violate it. One thing that comes with violating that boundary is that access requires responsibilities. Broken boundaries bring consequences and consequences should be for protection, not harm.  

Although setting boundaries can be hard at first, they can also positively impact your life. For me, it was difficult because I started setting boundaries at an early age. I first started setting boundaries when I was 12 years old right after I got bullied. Setting those boundaries made the guy who bullied me become my friend eventually. However, the process of setting those boundaries with that friend was hard because I kept giving him chances and boundaries that he kept breaking. But, in our senior year of high school, he changed and we became friends. So, setting boundaries can be hard at first, but they also can have a positive impact on your life in the end. 

Therefore, these reasons conclude that even though setting boundaries can be hard, it is all worth the struggle, the pain, and the heartache to do so. 

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