Dear Editor: It’s been a challenge, but for the past two months I’ve tried to raise the bar for cheap eating, and for those “The Great Fargo Potato Famine”
Provost Ingram Fights Budget Cuts as Pickled Parrot Bartender
In light of massive budget cuts, North Dakota State Provost Beth Ingram has taken a part-time position at The Pickled Parrot as a bartender, giving “Provost Ingram Fights Budget Cuts as Pickled Parrot Bartender”
The Turf Bought Out by Herd and Horns
Disclaimer: This is totally, 100 percent fake news. It is satire written for our annual April Fool’s edition, The Rectum. It is a joke and “The Turf Bought Out by Herd and Horns”
Burgum to Run for Student Body President, Again
North Dakota’s governor and former North Dakota State student body president, Doug Burgum, has announced his candidacy in the race for student body president. Burgum “Burgum to Run for Student Body President, Again”
Dietitian Tries Poetry
There once was a boy Who would only play with his toys. And would not eat his leafy greens “Your teeth will rot” His mother “Dietitian Tries Poetry”
Dexter Werner To Pursue New Sport
Over the years, many prominent NDSU student-athletes have gone on to play their sport in professional leagues. Football stars Carson Wentz, Marcus Williams and Billy “Dexter Werner To Pursue New Sport”
Dinosaur Escapes NDSU Research Lab
North Dakota State’s Research and Technology Park underwent a severe technical malfunction Monday, causing a tyrannosaurus rex to escape. The T-Rex is part of ongoing “Dinosaur Escapes NDSU Research Lab”
Student Senate Refuses to Replace Justice before Election
In a daring move, NDSU’s student senate is refusing to replace a student court justice until after the election season. Nobody has any clue where “Student Senate Refuses to Replace Justice before Election”