This article is satirical and fake. It is a part of our annual Rectrum special April Fools edition.
We all grew up playing it; it’s competitive, intense and has simple rules. The well-known sport, dodgeball, will be added to the list of 14 other sports for NDSU Athletics, coming in the fall of 2025 to NDSU.
The team will be composed of 12 players, with the matches being a full hour including 25-minute halves. Expanding its athletic and educational atmosphere, NDSU looks forward to adding another highly respected sport for the university and city of Fargo. Tickets will be free for students and a dollar for general admission. President Cook has also shared his love and excitement for the new startup sport.
The Bison dodgeballers already have a few recruits from around the nation but are offering playing spots to students at the University. White Moodgan, from the state of West Virginia, was the first of the recruits to sign. Moodgan won Propel Athlete of the Year and graduated top of his class, out of his 13 other classmates. Other recruits include Pook Eie, Kate Clark, Justin Cardoso, Owen Buekers, Dwight Watkins and Fran Brink.
Head Coach, Adam Sandler, has stepped up to help get the program running for the Bison, taking a break from his stellar golfing career. Sandler states that the team will share facilities with the NDSU football team in the practice facility. Sandler states, “I’m so hyped for this new experience. We can make the Bison ballers top dawgs with some techniques I have learned over the years, specifically from head coach Patches O’ Houlihan, my idol.”
As for NDSU students interested in performing in tryouts, the tryouts will be held in the SHAQ on April 18-20, 2025. The sign-up link for tryouts is located at the end of the article for more information.