Longboarders: are you a jerk?

A request to be a decent person while skirting around campus

JOHN SWANSON | THE SPECTRUM
I wish campus would be rid of punk-a** longboarders.

There are a lot of things to like about the few weeks of nice weather we get at the beginning of the school year: beautiful flowers, a general lack of vitamin-D deficiency, and sunlight that lasts longer than 2 hours. However, with nice weather comes one singular and unnecessary evil I wish campus would be rid of: punk-a** longboarders and skateboarders.

For some individuals who use plastic wheels as their main form of transport, it seems basic human dignity is also lost with that extra two minutes it would take you to walk instead. There have been times when I barely have room to walk down a sidewalk and then, like an angel of doom on penny-board wings, someone tries to squeeze through the mass of people with their board. 

I’ve had my ankles run over, I’ve had my car hit by a skateboard gone rogue, and frankly, I’ve had enough. 

There are exceptions, I know several chronic longboarders who have the capabilities to not ride around as if their reputations rely on them being a careless jerk. They ride on the street whenever cars aren’t present, the sidewalks whenever pedestrians aren’t present, and they definitely don’t have a VSCO page dedicated to their wheeled adventures.

I understand longboarding has become a status symbol on campus for the casual, the cool, and the habitually nonchalant, but I can guarantee you don’t look nearly as cool as you think you do. The images of you face-planting on the concrete stick in the mind a lot more than those of you effortlessly pushing past people. 

For those that are balance-challenged like me, the whole concept of longboarding is perplexing. However, I understand there is a social element to it, and that’s great. Even packs of giant football players on comically small motorbikes have managed not to bother anyone, I guarantee you can too.

The images of you face-planting on the concrete stick in the mind a lot more than those of you effortlessly pushing past people.

All this being said, I still have a lot of respect for longboarders. Your ability to get to class on time and not fall every time you hit a sidewalk crack truly astounds me. For those of you who actively avoid hip-checking pedestrians: I see you and I appreciate you. Keep on keeping it long.

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