Field-tested ways to kick breakup blues
First off: there is nothing messier than life, so if you’re looking for a guidebook to handle your feelings, please tell me when you find it because this stuff is tough. Second: everyone is different, so it will be easy to pick a part every piece of advice given in the following article. These are just some field-tested remedies for the immediate shock of a breakup.
Get comfortable
This is meant both in the literal and not so literal sense. Go only to the best of the best friends you have and do whatever makes you feel like the whole world’s not collapsing. Isolation is ill-advised, but it’s OK when you’re shocked or distressed to not leave your room or see another human being.
When you’re ready to reintroduce yourself to the people that mean the most to you, you will probably find open arms in that situation. This is why you have those special, indispensable people in your life that aren’t affected by the ebb and flows of romantic love. The big thing a lot of people find comfort in this situation is booze and lots of it. This is OK. If letting loose is a comfort, then do it, but remember that everything is temporary.
Get conceptual
You’re not ready to hit the gym or throw yourself into your work, but you might be ready to make some really melodramatic works of art. Remember when you were a kid? What did you create? Writing can be very comforting. It gives the heartbroken the ability to sprawl what used to be jumbled internal thoughts onto the page and maybe create something cohesive.
Even if you are not usually creative or have never been, the thoughts that you have are unique and beautiful and probably more poetic than ever at this point. Your heartbreak was a real and tragic event in your life, so treat it like it is. This can also bring about a more focused and productive mindset because you are turning pain into paper, words or a song instead of just more booze.
Get counseling
The Counseling Center is a great resource on campus, but it can be a bit overrun during certain times of the year. If you’re broke, talk to your friend. You would be amazed at how much your friends or parents actually care about what happened to you. It can sometimes feel hard to open up because our emotions can seem like our enemy, so we don’t feel like that poison should be put on other people. This isn’t true. Good friends and family are there for this very reason.
It’s easy to be there when your friend is a ball of sunshine, but when it hits the fan that’s when it really matters. For all the people who know someone who is going through this, tell them this. Tell them it would be a pleasure to sit in a freezing Toyota Corolla while you cry into the steering wheel.