In a strange change of events, the Electoral College has decided they are through with all of the silly games and are just going to put “Iguana Newton” in as the next president of the United States.

This comes just days after the announcement of Donald Lizard Trump being elected president-elect. The presumable 45th president has been under close scrutiny even since winning the election. While most saw this as a possibility, few saw this as reality.

The college, located just due east of the Legion of Doom’s headquarters, ruled last week in favor of this extreme measure. They cited social unrest and Twitter rants as their main reason.

Following the vote, President-elect Trump addressed the nation.

“I am in no way promoting what the Electoral College does or doesn’t do regarding my presidency.” He stopped to sniff the air with his tongue. “I just want what the American people want.”

Trump who ran a furiously charged campaign against his opponent, Hillary Salamander Clinton, has stuck true to his words thus far but opposition wonders how much longer that can continue.

“There is just no way he can deliver on his promises,” Billy Bison, a sophomore in the mechanical engineering program here at North Dakota State, said. He has his doubts about Trump’s presidency.

I stopped and chatted with him in an exclusive Spectrum interview last week.

“Trump is offering tax breaks while also adding social programs aimed at putting crickets and heat lamps in every American’s home,” Billy Bison said. “Personally, I just do not see where the funding is going to come from.”

Bison said he is more than ready and expecting the Electoral College to go in another direction than Trump. Billy Bison also noted that while Trump might have the heart of a chameleon, he also has the attitude of a Komodo dragon.

“He is a little too harsh for my flavor. Personally, I voted for Gary Gecko Johnson,” Billy Bison said.

With all the social unrest, it has only been a matter of when the Electoral College was going to act instead of if they were going to act.

“We thought initially the Electoral College was going to nominate Hillary Salamander Clinton, but they gave the nod to Iguana Newton,” Stephen A. Smith, our top political analyst stated.  “As far as president, Newton will not be better than the ’95-96 Bulls or ’15-16 Warriors.”

Iguana Newton is viewed as more of an outsider. A chameleon in sheep’s clothing some might say. While Newton didn’t do well in the polls, he is considered a better option by most who were scared of “throwing away” their vote on a third-party candidate.

“I think it is long overdue.” Brenda Bison, a senior majoring in computer science, said. She stopped and talked to us in the Memorial Union and expressed her disfavor with the election.

“Personally I didn’t see it coming,” she said. “The lizard people are really getting the choice wrong this time if they go with President-elect Trump. It is Gore-Bush all over again.”

Brenda Bison, who herself is an old “Bernie-Gal,” told us she doesn’t understand how this election got here.

“Bernie Sanders may not have had the scaly skin of those running against him,” she said. “I know he didn’t have a tongue that split into two, but you felt like he loved America.”

Brenda Bison was late to her yoga class but did note that she is fully ready for the Electoral College to choose Iguana Newton as the 45th president.

As far as fit for America, the Electoral College knows what they are going. Putting lizard people and Obama into office is what they do best. As far as the backlash The Spectrum is expecting a 75-93 percent increase in Gecko poison as Iguana Newton has stirred fears in most trailer parks about the inability to purchase such weapons under his presidency.

As far as other unrest, it seems like we will have to wait and see.