Dear Kelsey,

I have been thinking about cutting my hair short for quite some time. I know you recently cut yours, and I was wondering if you think it is a good idea.

Sincerely, 

Short Hair, Don’t Care

Dear Short Hair,

Going short is always a good idea, especially when you have enough to donate it to a charity like Locks for Love. There are so many advantages to going short, and many of the disadvantages you have heard are most likely false.

Different

It’s different. Not “different” in the Minnesota polite way meaning it’s ugly. It is unique. I tried to ask girls on campus what they liked about their short hair but I couldn’t. I walked all around the Union and was not able to find a single girl with her hair above her shoulders let alone her ears. So, if you opt for a pixie cut, I guarantee you will stand out.

Bold

Your facial features become more pronounced when you don’t have hair distracting from them. Your eyes look bigger, your nose smaller, your cheekbones higher and your jaw line sharper.

Sexy

What makes short hair so attractive is that it shows off your confidence. It tells people, “I don’t need hair down to my ass to be and feel sexy.” Because of you and your stunning short hair, people are changing the way they define beauty.

Five facts about short hair

– You do not need a certain face type to pull off a pixie cut.

– Short hair will not make your face look fat.

– Short hair does not make a girl a lesbian.

– To follow that up, “No, it does not bug me that my boyfriend has longer hair than me.”

– Not just old ladies and chemo patients have short hair.

Every time I cut my hair short, I find out who my real friends are. Inevitably someone will say, “I liked you better with long hair,” as though hair can change a personality. Or, more common someone who clearly does not know how the world works will ask, “So, are you a lesbian now?” because hair defines someone’s sexuality, right?

If you humor that person with, “No, I am not a lesbian now,” they will undoubtedly respond, “Then you might want to start wearing more make up and tighter fitting clothes …”

“And you might want to shut the hell up,” you will think. But instead, raise a strong middle finger and walk away because you know that short hair will make you a classy broad no matter what you do or say.

Own your new do’,

-K

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