Music Has Hit Low Places

Singers are running out of things to sing about.

I arrived at this conclusion a short while ago when I made an actual effort to interpret lyrics during work, an establishment that requires a moderate to loud volume setting of “today’s hit music.”

In retrospect this was a poor idea, and I don’t recommend it.

Yet I challenge anyone to turn on and analyze the first song they hear on a popular radio channel. Try not to laugh in utter disbelief at what the artist is singing about.

Have you ever heard of any instances in which loss of feeling, specifically to the face, occurs when attracted to someone?

A popular song by The Weeknd released this past summer has a catchy chorus that states, “I can’t feel my face when I’m with you, but I love it” and repeats that announcement a total of 10 times throughout the song’s entirety.

On the other hand, the next song played on the radio demands the listener to “watch me” an overwhelming number of times. When he finally gets your attention, he demands you break your legs.

What? No thanks, psycho. I’ll pass on that.

The following lyrics are consecutive, verbatim lines that were copied from a webpage of this particular song: “Now watch me duff, duff, duff, duff, duff, duff, duff, duff, duff. Now watch me bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop.”

These lyrics are so ridiculous that it can only be explained one of two ways:

1. The songwriters were under the influence of something strong

2. These lyrics were stolen from Mickey Mouse Playhouse

I’m going to guess a combination of the options. Honestly I could go on picking apart every song that plays, but you probably get my point by now.
Nonetheless, there is a reason these songs are featured on hit radio stations. Their beats are catchy; they have intriguing voices (despite the words) and more than likely pretty faces to match.

But really that doesn’t validate the “WTF. How is this popular?” feeling I get when I listen to music these days. Has the world gone mad?

Readers, what do you think? Is today’s popular music as perplexing to you as it is to me? Send your thoughts in a “letter to the editor” email sent to editor@ndsuspectrum.com.

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