Avocados are amazing. It is a simple truth that this diverse fruit can be used in just about any fashion.

Also, side note, if you can’t hunt avocados, a simple journey to Mexico will suffice. Make sure to hide at border, or you may have to pay a tax of 420%.

Anywhoozle (thanks, Grant), sometimes though it is nice to remind ourselves amazing and innovative ways to use avocados.

Welcome to Erik’s Cooking Column; where we will go over useful, healthy and delicious recipes.

Recipe #1:  Avocado Toast.

This one is so easy I would subject this for anyone looking for a quick breakfast or to seek favor with the gods.

Now to start just make sure that you have the essentials. A piece of bread, a toaster of course, an avocado and a 1960s VW Bus.

Optional ingredients include nutritional yeast, pepper, salt, olive oil and a bandanna.

First off, start toasting your bread. I usually use whole grain bread with like nuts and seeds around the edges. Can you imagine trendy avocado on white bread, yeah isn’t that gross? Stop thinking of it.

Alright, now that your toast is cooking gather your avocado. I kind of like taking this moment to appreciate my personal chi. My yoga instructor Dr. Googi (not an actual doctor) has really taught me so much about this dimension.

Anyway, gather your avocado and cut. This is important: cut with a knife along the north and south poles of the avocado. Cut to the pit. Then separate the two hemispheres. Once separated hit your knife perpendicular to the half and twist the pit 90 degrees, either way, remove. Ta-da! You accomplished something your father never said you would.

Alright now, your toast should be cooked (que toast on a plate). Now grab the avocado and scoop out its flesh. Make sure to clean up the blood.

Now depending on the ripeness of the avocado, it might be easy to spread or you might have to cut it with a spoon. Either way, you are an adult you can figure it out.

Now feel free to season with pepper and salt. Also consider nutritional yeast, olive oil or the blood of a ukulele player.

Now that that is seasoned it may seem like you are done.

Check that feeling at the door rookie. You are far from done. Where is your degree? Where is your spouse? What is the state of your 401k? The American dream is far from achieved.

Well there you have it; you have a nice treat for yourself or a friend. It is healthy and easy. Also, you can cover your feelings of inadequate-ness with a trendy food you just prepared.